Anorgasmia in Women: How to Overcome Orgasmic Disorder

Liisa Maimon
Founder and Senior Teacher

According to the ancient wisdom of Tantra, anorgasmia in women is an energetic blockage at the level of anahata chakra, the heart chakra.

This view regarding female anorgasmia contradicts the widely accepted western medicine perspective that it stems from a psychological manifestation, an emotional disturbance or a genital defect or flaw.

According to Tantra, it goes much deeper than that. Anorgasmia is a message from the soul of a woman, and for true healing to occur, it is vital for her to journey deep within herself and her consciousness to uncover the meaning of the message.

Anorgasmia in women according to allopathic medicine

Anorgasmia is known by many names including frigidity, female impotence, female sexual dysfunction and sexual arousal disorder. In sum, it is delayed, infrequent or an absence of orgasms all together despite adequate sexual arousal and stimulation.

The allopathic medical community sees anorgasmia in women as an issue that stems from no female libido, an inability to climax, an absence of pleasure, and, in some cases, feeling pain and discomfort during intercourse.

Anorgasmia according to Yoga and Tantra

Yoga and Tantra never take disease or dysfunction at face value. If there is a physical symptom showing up it is because there is an energetic disturbance happening on a more subtle layer or level.

In other words, the physical symptom is a by-product of out of balance energy or energy that is stuck and not flowing. The physical symptom that manifests outwardly is just that… a symptom, but certainly not the root cause.

Frigidity
Sexual dissatisfaction in women is known to lead to emotional and mental stress, relationship difficulties, lack of self-confidence, depression and more

You see, the human being is much more than just the physical body. We are comprised of multiple layers – from the most physical and gross body that we can see, feel, and control, to multiple highly subtle energy bodies that are imperceptible and extend out from the physical body. In addition to these subtle layers or bodies, we also have 7 energy centers, or chakras.

Disease, dysfunctions and poor health stem from energy disturbances or blockages that form at the level of one or more of these 7 chakras and/or at the level of one of the subtle bodies. If and when the energy disturbance becomes substantial enough, it will eventually trickle down to or permeate the physical body.

Anorgasmia is no different. The root cause of this form of female sexual dysfunction is not because of some physical deficiency in a woman, an anatomical anomaly or a defect. The exception here is in the case of genital mutilation, a traumatic accident to the pelvis, a total hysterectomy, childbirth complications, a spinal cord injury and/or use of multiple pharmaceutical drugs that can cause anorgasmia or have it as a potential side effect of the medication.

If, however, anorgasmia develops in an otherwise healthy woman with no apparent reason or cause, in Tantra, the root cause is energetic. More specifically, it is an energetic blockage at the level of the heart chakra, the fourth energy center of the human being.

A heart chakra blockage can show physical symptoms in the area of the physical heart or elsewhere in the body. In the case of anorgasmia it manifests in the genital area for women. There can also be emotional and psychological symptoms that show up as well, but again, these are not the root cause of the anorgasmia. They are simply secondary or tertiary symptoms of the blockage at the level of the heart chakra.

This is where allopathic medicine can be limited. Since it does not recognize and acknowledge the existence of energy, it often mistakes the symptom for the root cause.

The good news is that by working with all your energy bodies and chakras, you can restore health and heal from the inside out. Yoga and Tantra give you the tools and means to do just that. By becoming a tantric practitioner and doing tantric practices you can correct energetic disturbances that create disease and dysfunction, restore balance and harmonize your being.

Disease, dysfunctions and poor health stem from energy disturbances or blockages that form at the level of one or more of these 7 chakras and/or at the level of one of the subtle bodies.

How does a heart blockage develop?

A blockage at the level of the heart chakra can develop for many different reasons and circumstances, and at different times within a woman’s life.

For example, if a woman grows up in a very draconian and repressive environment, based on religion or otherwise, she may learn from a young age that matters of the heart are irrelevant, love is a fantasy and doesn’t exist, sexuality is immoral, a woman’s role is to please and serve a man, pleasure and desire are sinful, and other disparaging belief systems. This disconnects a young girl from her heart and soul at an impressionable age, which perseveres throughout her entire life, oftentimes on an unconscious level and as an automatic program.

Trauma and abuse, either verbally, emotionally, physically or sexually, can also create a blockage at the level of the heart, as can a history of repetitive broken hearts, traumatic break ups and loss due to death. These things can occur at any stage of a woman’s life.

Another very common cause of a heart blockage is remaining in an unhappy and unfulfilling relationship or marriage for a long time without resolution. More on that in the next paragraph…

 

Learn how to heal a broken heart

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Frigidity in marriage

Due to institutionalized marriage and society pressures, a very common modern conundrum many women face is staying in a perpetuating and pathologically unhappy and/or unhealthy marriage or relationship for a long duration of time.

The longer a woman remains in such a situation without resolution, the more she becomes disconnected from herself, her femininity, her pleasure, her heart and her desires.

She resolves in herself that she was just not meant to have great sex or great love and slowly starts to kill those needs and desires until she becomes numb to them entirely. She may also start to distance herself from her partner and the relationship may start to become cold and lonely.

frigidity
Staying in an unhealthy and unfulfilling relationship or partnership long term is just one of the ways a woman can develop frigidity

This is one of the ways in which female anorgasmia can manifest later in life for a woman and is not necessarily driven by childhood experiences or her upbringing.

The developed aversion appears to be towards the act of sex itself or sexuality generally, however, when digging deeper, women will oftentimes discover that the core of their frigidity is due to animosity, dissatisfaction or incompatibility with their partner or relationship, and not sexual intimacy itself. A fact that is proven often when a female sexual arousal disorder is immediately remedied by the fancy or touch of a new partner.

What happens when a woman is not sexually satisfied?

Female anorgasmia does not discriminate. Women from all walks of life, all ages and diverse backgrounds can experience some level of female orgasmic disorder in their lives.

As an authentic tantric school, we encounter more and more women these days who are unable to feel deep satisfaction or fulfillment on the sexual level. It is commonplace that women in their 30’s, 40’s and even 50’s have never experienced an orgasm once in their life.

The impact of this lack of intimacy and sexual pleasure is considerable on a woman’s psyche and feminine essence. Sensuality and sexuality are an innate part of who a woman is. It is built into her DNA, I could say.

When a woman is not sexually fulfilled she can become hardened, bitter, angry, resentful, controlling, robotic, judgmental, chronically sad, lonely, emotionally overwhelmed or emotionally numb, and anorgasmic, as we already discussed. Many diseases can also manifest when a woman is not sexually satisfied – diseases related to the female reproductive organs such as the breasts, ovaries and uterus.

 

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Many women who have resolved to never having a sexually satisfying life or relationship will very often redirect their sexual energy to other projects or hobbies. It is usually done on an unconscious level and is a coping mechanism to numb the pain or dissatisfaction. While this is admirable, it is not a long term solution.

Women need to be sexually fulfilled to be truly happy and healthy. Deep, fulfilling, intimate and satisfying sex reconnects a woman to her true nature and to her femininity. It is only in her femininity that she is relaxed and able to blossom into the Goddess that she is. Orgasmic pleasure helps her to stay grounded and balanced physically, mentally, emotionally and energetically.

I share all this with you because if you are a woman who is facing female anorgasmia, I urge you to not accept it or resolve that this is your destiny. Keep reading for anorgasmia treatments that are stemming from the yogic and tantric tradition.

When a woman is not sexually fulfilled she can become hardened, bitter, angry, resentful, controlling, robotic, judgmental, chronically sad, lonely, emotionally overwhelmed or emotionally numb, and anorgasmic

Signs you have a blockage at the heart chakra

Determining whether you have a blockage at the heart is not as clear-cut as one might expect, simply due to its energetic nature and origin.

Energy doesn’t always play by customary or habitual rules. An energetic imbalance can manifest differently in different people based on factors such as gender, astrological sign and makeup, past lives, physical health, the mind and mental composition, upbringing and genetics, just to name a few.

Nevertheless, here is a shortlist of the most common signs that a woman might display if she indeed has a blockage at this chakra:

  • A fear or aversion to touch
  • An inability to maintain sustained eye contact
  • Using laughter and humor incessantly to avoid intimate discussions or issues
  • Fear of intimacy
  • Skin disorders or problems
  • Disease at the area of the breasts
  • Concave chest
  • Emotional numbness

How to diagnose female sexual dysfunction

Like I mentioned earlier, the individual is comprised of many layers and levels. There are the physical, energetic, emotional, mental, sexual and spiritual levels. Each level is a vital contributing member to the whole construct.

When trying to diagnose female anorgasmia, it is common for multiple signs and symptoms to be present from multiple levels of her being. Also, keep in mind that having just one of the below symptoms does not suggest a woman is frigid AND female orgasmic disorder does not show up universally the same for every woman.

Physical: At the physical level anorgasmia can manifest as pain during sex, numbness in key erogenous zones such as the breasts and inside the vagina, chronic infections involving the vagina and/or other sexual organs, an inability to reach climax and orgasm and low or no sexual desire or drive.

Energetic: As explained above in detail, a heart chakra blockage is at the heart of frigidity.

Mental: Mentally a woman has a negative thought pattern and attitude towards sex, either rejecting it entirely as a fundamental part of her existence or demonizing her own sexuality as something that is shameful or sinful.

Emotional: Resentment, bitterness, anger, hysteria, emotional overwhelm, emotional numbness, and depression are a few examples of common manifestations at the emotional level.

The modern solution to female orgasmic disorder

woman vibrator
Climaxing superficially on a regular basis can leave a woman even more dissatisfied and sexually frustrated.

Modern sexologists present women who suffer from female orgasmic disorder with an “easy” solution – just learn how to stimulate the clitoris and achieve orgasm through rubbing and friction. More often than not this is an unsuccessful remedy and a harmful, superficial fix to a deeper problem.

You see, women are capable of achieving seven different types of orgasms. The clitoris orgasm is not only the most superficial, but also the most explosive and unfulfilling form of pleasure a woman can truly experience.

Regular climaxing at this level can leave a woman even more dissatisfied than she was before and desensitized to the deeper forms of pleasure and orgasms. It is a short-term resolution with long term implications and consequences causing a woman to lose vital life force energy, to become emotionally imbalanced and even more sexually frustrated.

Anorgasmia treatment in Yoga and Tantra

In the case of anorgasmia, the heart chakra needs to go through a cleansing and purification process and the woman must learn how to authentically live and give from the heart.

Anorgasmia can be easily and harmoniously cured if a woman is invested in her healing and rehabilitation. With the right techniques and dedication one can learn how to properly open, balance and purify the heart chakra and be well on her way to feminine blossoming, sexual fulfillment and oceanic orgasmic bliss.

Below is a list of powerful Tantra Yoga techniques that are easy to follow and implement into a daily routine.

#1 Bhujangasana

Also known as the Cobra Pose, bhujangasana is one of the most powerful yoga asanas to open and balance the heart chakra. In order for a woman to truly reap the rewards of this asana there must be a strong focus and concentration on the flow of energy permeating the center of the chest, as described under the execution section below.

Also, bhujangasana should be performed for a continuous amount of time. As a beginner you can start with 1-2 minutes nonstop. However, slowly build up to 10, 15 and even 20 minutes daily in order to maximize results and realize the full potential of this asana on the heart chakra.

Execution

Lie down on your stomach with the legs separated. Place the palms of your hands flat on the ground directly under your shoulders. Extend the arms fully, arching the back while gently tilting the head back. If this is uncomfortable on the low back, simply walk the hands forward, decreasing the degree of extension in the low spine. Find a comfortable level of performance for you, which you can sustain and maintain for several minutes at a time. Alternatively, you can do the sphinx position as demonstrated in the photos.

Close your eyes and focus your attention on your heart chakra. Try to perceive energy from above streaming down and directly infusing your heart. If your mind wanders away from the point of concentration at any time, simply bring it back.

Full Bhujangasana
Variation 1 of Bhujangasana
Variation 2 of Bhujangasana

#2 Music Meditation

Music, when it is of a certain quality and resonance, can be a dynamic healer and positive remodeler of the substructure of the deeper aspects of our being. In this case, because we want to heal and affect anahata chakra, we will use music that reverberates at the frequency and level of the heart. Our advanced teachers specifically recommend music by the famous composer Mozart.

frigidity
Music meditation is a powerful technique in Tantra that can help a woman to heal on deep levels of her being.

Execution

Find a quiet space to perform a music meditation. It is best to use an external speaker to project the music, as opposed to earphones. Come to a comfortable seated position, using props or pillows if necessary. It is important that you sit for this meditation, not lie down.

Begin playing the music (rather loud) and close your eyes. Concentrate fully on the sounds that are coming from the speaker. Allow the music to simply penetrate your entire being. As though you are a sponge, absorbing the music wholly. Try not to judge or analyze the music or move your body in any way. Just simply sit still and get lost in the music. This should be done for 20-30 minutes daily.

#3 Guided Meditation

A guided meditation can help a practitioner surpass the conscious part of their mind where limitations lie, and access the subconscious aspect which is home to pure potential, limitlessness and non-judgement. When a meditation is guided by a spiritually adept teacher then valuable impressions and suggestions can be implanted deep in the mind and a person can experience a positive remodeling and upgrading of their level of consciousness.

In this guided meditation, Somananda’s hypnotic voice melts you into a state of selflessness and compassion at the level of anahata chakra. Experience deep levels of relaxation where your mind meets your heart and your heart meets your mind. Become a beacon of light as vibrations of universal love radiate from the center of your chest and pierce the fabric of universal consciousness.

Execution

Find a quiet space for meditation where you will not encounter disturbances of any kind. Come to a comfortable seated position, using props or pillows if necessary. It is important that you sit for this meditation, not lie down. Begin playing the guided meditation. Close your eyes and follow the guidance and instruction of Soma. This meditation can be done daily or alternated with music meditation every other day.

Giving from the heart

Paradoxically, those who suffer from anorgasmia must learn how to give selflessly from the heart. In addition to practicing the above-mentioned techniques often and consistently, learning how to give from the heart can be an incredible tool in anorgasmia treatment.

During the love making process a woman should refrain from focusing on her own pleasure and trying to receive or reach orgasm. Instead, the concentration and focus should be on her partner, loving him wholly and pleasing him earnestly and intently.

This can be a challenging concept for many, especially when the frigid road is wrought with frustration, defeat, sadness and disappointment. To ask a woman with anorgasmia to fully dedicate and give herself to another is unsettling, and yet this is exactly where the solution lies.

Insisting that someone outside of you, whether that be a partner or a healthcare professional, needs to please you, fix you, fulfill you or heal you, simply perpetuates female orgasmic disorder.

When a woman focuses on giving more to her lover authentically from the heart – more pleasure, more love, more satisfaction – she will discover that she is better able to receive and that her pleasure receptors and sensors will be remarkably enhanced.

A sexual union with this mindset will alter a lot within the woman’s psyche and ultimately transmute the heart blockage – which is the original seed of the female sexual arousal disorder.

Herbal treatments

There are many herbal treatments that can also support a woman in eradicating anorgasmia for good. It is important to note, however, these natural remedies should be supplemental to the above spiritual protocol for a complete “anorgasmia treatment”.

Ayurvedic Herbs: There are several well-known Ayurvedic herbs that can boost libido and sexual performance, naturally. Such aphrodisiacs include ashwagandha, ginkgo biloba and red ginseng. While these medicinal substances have the potential to arouse our natural and innate sexual energy, this can bring about negative consequences according to Tantra; namely the loss of the sexual energy or vital life force energy. Therefore, it is highly recommended that prior to incorporating such herbs into your regimen as a natural solution to any sexual dysfunctions that you first learn the art of Spiritual Tantra Sexuality and become proficient in sexual continence.

Damiana Tea: A native shrub to Central and South America and the West Indies, this is a medicinal plant with aphrodisiac qualities. Frequent use can improve sexual satisfaction, increase orgasm frequency, reduce vaginal dryness and generally assist women to overcome frigidity.

Yoni douche: Due to toxic and unhealthy lifestyles the yoni can become overrun with harmful bacteria that can reduce sexual drive, decrease natural vaginal lubrication, increase foul vaginal odors, imbalance the yoni flora, promote (chronic) infections, and cause many other unpleasant side effects.

Yoni douche can be a natural and safe alternative to allopathic medicines and provide many beneficial effects. For this procedure you will need a kit, which can easily be obtained online. You can create your own DIY formula using natural substances such as apple cider vinegar, chamomile tea, essential oils, distilled water, Castile soaps and nourishing oils. Of course, it is important you do your own research and perhaps speak to a trusted doctor before administering your own treatments. An alternative to yoni douches’ is yoni steams.

The tantric path

Anorgasmia is a widespread issue encompassing a level of human suffering, because, at the end of the day, we are all sensual and sexual beings.

Sexual delight is our natural birthright, says Tantra (and Sigmund Freud), and it is vital for human psychology and spiritual totality. It is an inherent need and desire as a human being to join a lover in joyous sexual union and plunge through the gates of cosmic ecstasy as one. When the sexual appetite is not satiated it can leave a wake of hardship in the life of a woman and her interpersonal relationships with others.

Frigidity
The tantric path is abundant with knowledge and techniques that can alleviate many of the modern problems and issues human beings face today, including frigidity.

Tantra is abundant with wisdom and techniques to alleviate many modern ailments that plague humanity today, including and especially anorgasmia. With energy being the cornerstone of all tantric teachings, it is incredibly far-reaching and beyond powerful. Tantra has the capacity of touching any human being on all levels – physically, energetically, mentally, emotionally, sexually and spiritually.

These ancient practices are the modern remedy to all human suffering and disease. Tantra Massage, Tantric Sexuality and Tantra Yoga are just a few of the paths within Tantra that can help women overcome anorgasmia. These are proven solutions that don’t just address the symptom but the true cause and core of such issues. They leave a woman not just freed of symptoms or restored to normalcy, but renewed, whole, reconnected, fulfilled and spiritually and energetically alive.

What pharmaceutical medicine or clitoral orgasm can make such promises? It pays to get to the root of the issue and discover who you truly are and what you are capable of!

Liisa Maimon

Founder and Senior Teacher

An inspiring tantric yogini, Liisa is a strong driving force of the school – both as a senior teacher and general manager.

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